I made my decision.
I’m not going to try anymore.
Make no more attempts.
This time, I’ll do it. I will become fit and slim.
I’ve been overweight for as long as I can remember. Sometimes a little, sometimes a lot. At this moment, a little bit too much. So it is time for action. Not that I never acted before. I quit sugar, I exercised, I ate healthy. All of that did something of course, but it never lasted. Eventually -like so many people- I returned to my old (bad) behavior. I think I now found out the reason why though.
Reading a book about being in charge of your life, it hit me. Simple but effective: make a decision. I’m tricking my brain with these words, because failure is not an option. I will become fit and slim. It’s not trying, like I did before, it’s doing. Trying means there’s an option to fail. When things get tough, you tell yourself you’ve tried and then give up. When you start out with this option in mind, chances are, you will indeed give up.
Another reason I failed before, is that my motives were not important enough. Sure, I wanted to be healthy, but as long as there are no symptoms, it’s hard to recognize the urgency. Then, there is always room for just one more bag of chips. Sure, I wanted to look nice, but there are always bigger clothes to buy, which hide what you don’t want to show quite nicely. Lastly, summer is far away most of the year when you live in The Netherlands.
So…I needed something better. A reason to get and keep going. Something I really, desperately want, but can’t get because of my ‘state-of-body’. Something that outweighs (pun intended) the comfort of unhealthy food and laziness. After giving this a good thought, I found it. For a long time now, I have wanted to learn to surf. Last year I took my first and only lesson. It was amazing. The sea gave me a hard time (it was very windy), it was cold (April in The Netherlands), it was exhausting (my level of fitness was on its way from medium to my current bad) and I did not stand up on the board once. But I had the time of my life.
I would love to go to the beach again for another lesson, but I know there is no point. The sea would have no mercy with me, being in the shape that I’m in today. Not to mention wearing a wet suit. A tourist might think a whale has beached and start pushing me back in the water.
That was all I needed to make my decision. I know my destination.
One year from now, I will be fit and slim enough for my second surf lesson.
I don’t need to hope I can do it. I know I can.